To The Person I Want To Be.

I struggle a lot with who I currently am, and who I want to be. I have constant wanderlust and an urge to be bettering myself. I feel like I am the laziest version of a perfectionist in any sense of the term. I quickly become overwhelmed and easily lose motivation for the sudden bursts of creativity I have. But, like many of you, I am working on it.

It is easy to become overwhelmed when the world seems so big. I am constantly questioned about my plans for the future, I am told to make a five-year plan, what I am doing now to better my future. The honest answer is, I don’t know. If I have learned anything in the 19 years I have been on this earth, it is life doesn’t work out the way you expect it to. That isn’t a bad thing, in fact, most of the time it is good. But good or bad, it is overwhelming.

I don’t know what job I’m going to have, what city or even country I will make a home in, what kind of dog I’ll have. Certain characteristics stay constant with what I do know, though. I know exactly the kind of woman I want to be.

I want to never settle. I want to understand my worth and make sure others recognize it too. I need to constantly push myself or I think I will never feel fulfilled. Doing something that doesn’t constantly allow me to learn and grow is not something I want to be doing.

I want to be a girl boss. I want to answer to myself only. I want to watch my ideas grow into something bigger because I believed in them and put the work in to make sure they reached the best point they could.

I want to be cultured. I want to travel the world, learn about cultures that are nothing like my own. I want to understand the world from multiple points of view. I want to connect with as many people as possible that share the same earth as I do, I want to know their stories.

I want to be happy. Wherever I am in the future, I hope I am happy with the work I have put in, the friends I have, and the memories I’ve made. I hope I never stop wanting to learn and grow.

I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know I can do as much as I can now to prepare, but I still have to live in the moment and love the life I have, because no one knows what the future holds.

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